Caring Too Much

Is it possible to care too much for your client? I believe it is and see it happen to some of my students as they begin to manage cases. Caring too much can lead to lack of clarity as well as ill health on the part of the practitioner. Let me explain more.

Often we make emotional ties to our clients especially if we like them. Some people we are drawn to in a personal way even though they are our clients. This is a natural response to another human being. There can be great affinity for another. Other clients we do not make the same emotional bonds with and it seems a little easier, even if Hahnemann warned us to be unprejudiced observers. It is prejudice to have any feelings beyond empathy. Sympathy is to have feelings that are similar to the person you are in sympathy with. To feel these it is usually because they trigger a similar hurt that we carry in ourselves.

When we are in sympathy with another we have lost our clarity. We are now experiencing our own emotional response. We need clarity and distance to be able to see the case before us. If we do not have this we might as well be prescribing for ourselves.

Caring too much can also makes us the healer by default. If our care  does not include giving all outcomes back to a divine will, then our ego is attached to the outcome of our desire. This is a setup for more emotional pain in the practitioner. This pain will again keep us locked into an expected outcome and when  the case does not proceed as we think it should; we will have lost clarity. All healing is between the person and G-d. We are practitioners under the guidance of a divine energy that is operating through all creation. By recognizing this, we are merely a tool for the divine. We are responsible for our actions, but not for the outcome. This brings us to be very responsible as our role as homeopath, but not as healer.

Caring too much can take it's toll on the practitioner. Over time I have seen others burn out, including myself, when the demands of our work keep us from taking good care of ourselves. Remember the maxim, physician, heal thyself. I think this is one of the most important things to remember when taking care of others. We must not loose sight of our own health in the process. It can happen easier than we might think.

Symptoms of caring too much can lead to anxiety, worry, sleeplessness, fear, resentment, and many other ways of suffering  particular to the individual. Eventually the practitioner will want to give up. The returns on the energy expended will not be enough to continue. This is the burn out stage and the practitioner needs a rest and some distance to come back to clarity.

Rubrics from the Complete 2009 Repertory to consider when caring becomes too much are;

• Mind; ANXIETY; Others, for (77) : acet-ac., 3Acon., aeth., androc., 3Arg-n., 3Ars., aur., 3Aur-m-n., 3Aur-s., bar-c., borag., calc-ar., calc-m., 3Calc-p., calc-s., calc-sil., carb-an., carb-v., 2carc., catha-e., 3Caust., chel., cocc., corv-c., culx-p., cupr., cyg-c., 3Dulc., falco-p., 3Ferr., ferr-p., fl-ac., germ., helod-c., hep., herin., ign., lac-del., lac-eq., lac-h., lach., lamp-c., 2lap-be-e., latex, leon., lsd, 3Manc., mand., merc., methylp-h., musca-d., naja, nat-c., nelu., nitro., 3Nux-v., onc-t., perh., perla, petr., ph-ac., 3Phos., phys., polyst., puls., 4RHUS-T., ros-ca-a., sac-alb., scorp., sep., 3Spig., 3Staph., 3Sulph., taosc., 2tax-br., uran-n., zinc.

• Mind; SYMPATHETIC, compassionate (110) : acon., adam., aeth., 2aids, alco., aloe, alum-s., am-c., ambr., ana-i., androc., arg-n., arn., aur., 3Aur-m-n., aur-s., bac., bani-c., bar-c., bar-p., bell., beryl., 2bos-s., calc., 3Calc-p., cand-a., caras., 3Carc., carl., 3Caust., cench., chin., chir-f., 3Cic., clad-r., cocc., coloc., corv-c., croc., cupr., cypra-e., dros., 3Dulc., enal-c., ephe., 3Falco-p., ferr-p., garden., germ., gins., graph., haliae-lc., harp., hell., helod-c., hydrog., 3Ign., ilx-p., iod., kola., lac-f., lac-leo., lac-lup., lach., lamp-c., 2lepro., lim-b-c., loxo-r., lsd, lyc., 3Lyss., mag-c., manc., mand., med., melal-l., merc., micro-a., mosch., 3Nat-c., 3Nat-m., 2nic-r., 3Nit-ac., nuph., 3Nux-v., oci-s., onc-t., oxyg., 4PHOS., plut-n., posit., pter-a., puls., pyrit., querc-r., ros-ca-a., ros-d., ros-g., salx-f., scorp., sep., seq-s., 3Staph., stram., tarent., tax., teg-a., tub., ulm-c., uran-n.

• Mind; WEEPING, tearful mood; Sympathy for others, from (11) : bar-c., carc., carl., caust., falco-p., lyc., mand., nit-ac., puls., ros-ca-a., sep.

• Mind; SYMPATHY, compassion; Ailments from, agg. (28) : aego-p., arg., 3Arn., ars., 3Bell., bufo, cact., 3Calc., carb-ac., cham., clem., coff., con., hell., 4IGN., kali-s., lil-t., musa, 4NAT-M., 3Plat., polyst., posit., sabal., sep., 3Sil., sulph., syph., toxop-p.

• Generalities; WEAKNESS; Nursing the sick, from (9) : carb-v., 3Cimic., 4COCC., 3Nit-ac., 3Nux-v., olnd., puls., zinc., 3Zinc-ar.

• Mind; ANXIETY; Nightwatching, after (6) : aur., caust., 3Cocc., cupr., 4NIT-AC., nux-v.

• Mind; ANXIETY; Future, about (169) : acon., adam., aego-p., aeth., agar., alco-s., allox., 3Aloe, 3Alum., alum-p., aml-n., 3Anac., anan., 3Ant-c., 3Ant-t., aquilr-a., arg-n., arist-cl., arn., 3Ars., astac., aster., aur., 3Aur-m-n., 3Aur-s., 3Bamb-a., 3Bar-c., 3Bar-m., bar-s., beryl., bros-g., 4BRY., bufo, buth-aust., calad., 4CALC., calc-acet., 3Calc-ar., calc-f., calc-p., calc-s., carb-an., carb-v., 2carc., 2cassi-s., 4CAUST., cham., 3Chel., 3Chin., 4CHIN-S., chir-f., choc., chrysan., 4CIC., cimic., cinis-p., clem., cocc., coff., 3Con., conch., culx-p., cupr., curc., cycl., 2cyg-c., 3Dig., dirc., 3Dros., 3Dulc., 3Euph., euphr., falco-p., ferr., ferr-acet., ferr-c., 3Ferr-p., fl-ac., fum., 3Gels., germ., gins., 3Graph., grat., harp., hell., hep., hipp., hura, 3Iod., kali-br., 2kali-c., kali-m., kali-p., kalm., kola., lac-leo., 3Lach., 2lap-be-e., lar-ar., lat-h., laur., lil-t., lith-c., lsd, lyc., 3M-arct., mag-c., mang., mant-r., meny., merc., methylp-h., 3Mur-ac., nat-acet., nat-ar., 3Nat-c., 4NAT-M., nat-p., nat-s., nelu., 3Nit-ac., nitro., 3Nux-v., onc-t., 3Op., ozone, parth., perla, 4PETR., 3Ph-ac., 4PHOS., plat., psor., 3Puls., querc-r., ran-b., 3Rhus-t., 3Sabin., scroph-n., scut., 3Sep., 3Sil., sol, sol-t-ae., spect., 3Spig., 4SPONG., 3Stann., 3Staph., stram., stront-c., sul-ac., 4SULPH., tab., taosc., tarent., tax., telo-s., 3Thuj., tub., ulm-c., 2vanil., verat., vichy-g., vichy-h., viol-t., wies., xan.

There are a few remedies worth noting for when the practitioner has cared too much and is is now suffering. These I have found to be most useful;

• Carcinosin - When there is too much concern that has left the person a bit vacant. Weeping with sympathy. Loves the excitement of a thunderstorm. Looks like a combination of many different remedies.
• Causticum - The "cause to come" When the cause becomes bigger than the person can manage successfully. Paralysis, either physical or mental. Brain fag. Forgetful.
• Cimicifuga - When the pattern of energy is like a chicken with it's head cut off. Always another fire to put out.
• Cocculus - After loosing much sleep, either to taking care of others or worrying about them.
• Nitric Acid - When resentment has set in and the lack of care is the result. A truly burned out state.
• Pulsatilla Nigricans - When there is much weeping. When the emotions loose control often and weeping is the result.

It is not cold-hearted to be unsympathetic. It is actually not a good place for the practitioner to be in sympathy with their client. They will not have clarity. Having empathy is much healthier. This will include the capacity to care without having an emotional response to it. Then we have not lost our center to an emotional response and can really show up for our client. We will not have to suffer ourselves because we care inappropriately for our client. Eventually caring too much will take it's toll on us and we will eventually either burn out or become ill ourselves. Then we are not much help to our clients.

So take good care of yourselves. Care about your role as the practitioner. Do good work. And leave the rest to G-d. All things are possible and our trust of this equals our faith in the healing powers of homeopathy.